VivaCity

My 3-yr-old son seems to be in the midst of some sort of identity crisis. His lovable little self needs confirmation at every step in every process, and then seems to find it easier to remove himself from the situation entirely and transform into something fantastic.

"Spence, come eat your dinner." (You're thinking, Oh, what a simple request. You poor fool.)
"Come eat?"
"Yes."
"Come eat my dinner?"
"Yes."
"At the table?"
"Yes!"
"Sit down at the table and eat my dinner?"
(Sigh, smack forehead) "Yes. Please. Some time today."
"Today?"
"YES, baby, today, right now, puh-LEEZE."

Pause.

"Call me 'dragon.' Say, 'Come eat your dinner, dragon.'"

At which point I usually take the fork from his place setting and begin stabbing myself in the eye socket, which is much less painful.

So he's got this split personality thing going on, which can be frustrating. Dragons tend not to eat their vegetables, to breathe fire into their baby brother's face, and abhor any bedtime which might cut into their townspeople-scaring time.

I'll wait this one patiently out...I am loathe to stifle any creativity...But if it continues much longer than the average phase, I think I'll request that he address me as Queen Mommy, Ruler of the Known Universe, and see just how dedicated he is to keeping up this charade, because let's face it, a Queen Mommy trumps an ordinary dragon any day of the week. I've had years to perfect my imagination, dear boy, don't tempt me.