VivaCity

I have a new job. This may interfere with my commitment to growing The World’s Largest Secretary Ass, but so be it. This double-wide is moving on to bigger and better things, dear reader, and hopefully, fingers crossed, even more fodder for such sarcastic fun as you’ve enjoyed thus far.

My decision to move the hell on occurred about 2.5 seconds after being informed, a couple of weeks (good Lord, has it only been that long?) ago that I was being passed over for a promotion. Not just any promotion, THE only promotion that a lowly secretary such as myself might ever hope for in this teeny, tiny closet of an office. Which used to feel cozy, but now feels like the walls are closing in like that scene in Star Wars where they’re being smushed to death by an intergalactic garbage compactor. Horrible way to go.

Utter bullshit. I was forced out of the office manager position because one of the owners thought his wife would make a lovely front office fixture (wrong-o, she wears aquamarine mascara circa 1985, ‘nuff said). But in a desperate scramble to explain themselves to an understandably upset me, they attempted to mislead my gullible ass into believing that I was not a “go-getter.” Oh, really? How about I “go get” myself a new effing job, how’s that for go-getting? I hope you like green eyeshadow. Enjoy the view.

So, this blog will be coming to you live and direct from a lovely patent law office downtown, beginning Monday, October 9. Until then, I shall be smuggling juicy little tidbits of the circus that is my life from the trenches, faithful reader. Viva VivaCity!