Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Hah! A-member me? (Think Eddie Murphy doing Buckwheat.)

There are no words in the English language to convey the pace of nonstop insanity 'round these hee-yuh pahts. A lovely, lovely girl here at work has taken three weeks off to get married and go on her honeymoon, which of course makes me so jealous I could puke...Not to mention I have to cover for her, and her three attorneys, and my three attorneys...All I'm saying is, I fully expect a Porsche parked outside with my name on it when everyone else gets their little bonus checks. It's only fair.

Then of course I've got my duties to both the Parent Committee and Policy Committee at the boys' daycare. We've also enjoyed a couple of playdates (did you know bowling is all the rage in the 4-year-old set?) and been preparing to move (I'm SO OVER this damned city) and I HAVEN'T EVEN TOUCHED ON THE HOLIDAYS YET!! It really is a mad, mad world, no doubt, and I have this crazy feeling that I alone act as the axis, holding it all together by sheer will and determination. I think I can, I think I can, I think I can...I think, therefore I...can. All righty, moving right along...

Thanksgiving was lovely, thanks for asking, with Grandma's own homemade gravy and my cute little butterball (the turkey was good, too) on his best behaviour and no blood spilt amongst cousins. A Thanksgiving Day miracle, really. No stovetop fires, no ruined dishes, not even any snow (a few drops struggling to be flaky, nothing more) to block the roads. Marvelous. I still feel like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop, honestly. It just doesn't feel like a holiday without some small catastrophe.

But we've got Christmas to look forward to now, folks, the holiday that used to be magical and full of anticipation and wonder and awe...Now it feels more like going to the gas station and getting bent over. I wish it worked that way, instead of this long torturous drawn-out event where I am nickle-and-dimed to death. I wish I could just pull up to a dispenser, empty my wallet and half my bank account into one side and out of the other side would pour some crap that won't last, because that's what I'm doing, folks! I am surely making down payments on my own demise, since any Lego or block I buy will only end up underfoot in some seemingly haphazard way that I KNOW has a larger design and purpose. I'm hip to your game, my dear boys. And when I come back from the hospital, I'll be fitted with a bionic leg, the better to kick your butts with. I hope whatever scheme I can see brewing behind those innocent baby blues is worth it.

If I sound a tad cynical, I suppose I'm just feeling that I'm shouldering a little more than my fair share these days, with no one to really gripe to except you, dear Reader(s). I appreciate you having returned to read at all, given that I'm a sporadic blogger at best (do I smell a New Year's resolution?) and if you've made it thus far, bravo, and the happiest of holidays to you and yours. :)